if I could give advice to ppl just starting w/ digital marketing on social media…
do not learn your marketing by copying the loudest person in the room
Question: If you could give one piece of advice to someone starting on FB, what would that be?
My answer:
do not mirror the noise.
1. copying volume is not the same as learning strategy
It is incredibly easy to get on Facebook for the first time and begin marketing by mirroring what appears to “work.” The hooks, the urgency, the bait, the dramatic positioning, the polished confidence. From the outside, it reads as clarity and certainty. It looks like momentum.
But copying tactics without context means adopting practices you do not fully understand. You do not see their backend, their margins, their retention, their long game, or their values. You are seeing the surface layer of performance, not the structural decisions underneath it.
Surface replication feels productive. It rarely builds durable stability.
2. marketing is emotional posture
Marketing is not just tactics. It is tone, pacing, and emotional posture. When you copy someone’s voice, you absorb more than structure. You absorb their urgency, their pressure, and their escalation rhythm.
Over time that rhythm becomes your baseline communication style. If it does not align with your personality or your values, your body registers the mismatch long before your brain can articulate it. The friction shows up subtly, as tension after posting or the quiet sense that you are performing instead of communicating.
Repeated friction becomes burnout.
3. tone builds trust through coherence
People do not just read your content. They pattern match it. If Monday you sound grounded and Thursday you sound aggressive and sales heavy, that inconsistency creates cognitive friction. Trust forms through coherence over time.
When tone shifts dramatically based on trends, it signals instability rather than growth. Your audience may not consciously analyze it, but they feel it. What many people call “the ick” is often just misalignment detected by the nervous system.
Coherence builds credibility.
4. content iq: study structure, not personality
There is a difference between learning and mimicking. High content IQ means studying frameworks without absorbing personas. It means learning clarity without copying cadence, observing continuity instead of theatrics, and separating someone’s strategy from their identity.
If a hook feels dishonest in your body, that sensation is information. If something performs well but leaves you tense after posting, that tension is data. Performance metrics are not the same thing as relational trust.
Before adopting someone’s tactics, ask whether it aligns with your values, whether you would stand behind it long term, and whether you would communicate that way in person. Sustainable marketing is intrinsic alignment. Volume without alignment quietly erodes credibility.
5. build from self trust
When your tone is borrowed, your results feel fragile because they depend on constant external input. When your tone is aligned, growth feels steadier because it is anchored internally.
You are not chasing trends. You are building continuity.
Facebook does not need another replica of whoever is trending this week. It needs people who sound like themselves consistently over time.
Marketing without ick
If you are a digital marketer and this entire piece felt like relief instead of resistance, you are probably craving something different.
A room where strategy is discussed without theatrics. Where tone matters. Where sustainability, ethics, and human values matter. Not just getting the bag. But getting your bag in a way that does not make you reject yourself.
Her Digital Desk is that room.
It is a working space for digital marketers who want to grow with clarity, coherence, and self-trust instead of pressure and noise.
Her Digital Desk
Join us: facebook.com/groups/herdesk